I am a dynamic figure, often seen scaling walls and crushing ice. I have been known to remodel train stations on my lunch breaks, making them more efficient in the areas of heat retention.
I once rescued an entire village of women and children in the Amazon from a horde of vicious army ants using only a glass of water and a folding chair. I am an abstract artist, a veteran in love, and an outlaw in Peru.
I can pedal bicycles up steep inclines with unflagging speed, and I bake 30-minute brownies in only 20 minutes.
On Wednesdays after I finish writing my blog, I repair small electrical appliances free of charge.
I once read Moby Dick, Gone With the Wind and To Kill a Mockingbird all in one afternoon and still had time to refurbish an entire dining set of antique furniture.
I am currently building a life-size replica of the Brooklyn Bridge in my backyard.
I bat 400 left handed, and I was once scouted by the Mets.
I have memorized the location of every item in the supermarket. I sleep once a week.